Now sat quite firmly in my 36th year, my innocence lost long ago and my loneliness ever increasing since my thirtieth birthday came and went, I pass most days in a self-made limbo. It's my reality. I've accepted it.
I find strong satisfaction and great contentment in raising my wild and insanely brilliant offspring but the nights can get a bit... empty at times. So I pass those hours watching loads of films, journaling, practicing my languages, and on the really dismal night I dance.
I dance wildly, passionately, insanely, and dangerously. I spin and whirl and jump and tumble. I run about the sofas. I karaoke my way across the coffee table. I even somersault and jump about the bed. I laugh and lose myself in the utter exhilaration of the movements. It's glorious and brilliant and liberating. I dance until my breath is so quick I can barely capture it, my heart the near mimic of a hummingbird's wings.
The emptiness fades a bit and the void begins overflowing with laughter at the silliness of it all. It truly is a grand thing. One I recommend.
One I did tonight.
One that sent me flying from the bed to the floor as I attempted a half-cartwheel twist.
I'm still aching from the impact as well as the deep, intense belly laughter that erupted shortly after I stopped seeing shooting stars.
Perhaps I should have had a partner... one that would have caught me as he danced wildly by my side. Who knows... maybe in a few more years:-)
Until then, enjoy my wild-dance-until-the-emptiness-fades song. It's sure to bring a smile. And whether you've found that amazing walk-through life lover and friend or are managing things on your own... Go out and have that dance!
Best to be alone than in the wrong relationship though Marie. I've never got anything out of dancing except when I was listening to The Beatles when I was 15 or 16 ~ I think it was 'She Loves You' that get me on the dance-floor ...
ReplyDeleteI used to play the acoustic guitar, not very well, and write my own songs, not very good, but it helped. I haven't played a guitar for 20 years or so now.
Keep on dancing and one day I hope it will be with the man of your dreams.
Love dancing to The Beatles! I simply love dancing. Always have. I dance whilst doing dishes. I dance in the seat of my car whilst driving. Oh, I love to dance! I've done ballroom dancing, although it's been ages since I've practiced that. I've belly danced. My old housemate was part of an ethnic dance troupe and invited me to some of the meetings during university. I adored it. We did various folk dances from around the world. It was fantastic. I learnt so much. I used to love clubbing just for the dancing. My friends would be looking for fellas but I never once took so much as a phone number, I just danced. I miss being young every now and again;-) But my favourite dancing is simply free dancing with the rhythm of the tune. It makes me smile.
ReplyDeleteI played a little guitar many, many moons ago, too, but very poorly. I think I mastered five major chords:-) I wrote poetry and songs as well, but never anything worth sharing. I'm sure yours were quite lovely and good!
As to the man of my dreams, he's just a regular joe who's kind and good-hearted and likes me just as I am. I'm not holding my breath or looking, but who knows, one day when I'm free to be... I very well may get that dance after all:-)
i used to want to be a professional dancer. i was always dancing as a child. i could never get my parents to get me lessons, though. not sure why. i can't even imagine that i would want to do that now because i can't dance worth crap anymore. i blame mtv.
ReplyDeleteI forgot that I used to like barn dances ... I only ever folk danced 2 or 3 times but I liked that every single time. As for my songs being any good, I dare say the only good they did was perhaps [in some very small way] to encourage Marcus Jordan to write some quite splendid songs with his friend Jamie Taylor.
ReplyDeleteKerry- I always wanted to take ballet. I'm actually glad I never did because I can't imagine breaking my toes to achieve various moves. I used to want to take tap as well. I taught myself a few minor things from both, nothing to write home about:-) And no one said you had to be good to dance! Let's not forget Elaine:-D I bet you are better than you think!
ReplyDeleteCharlie- my family and I used to go over the mountain to a rather large barn dance weekly. My uncle's bluegrass band played there. I loved it. I remember a friend's father partnering me once and when we would spin he would spin me so hard my feet would leave the floor. I'd smile so big! Wonderful times, beautiful memories. And you quite right about MJ... his music is very good. Some of the favourite musical moments of my day are his band's tunes popping up on my mp3 when it's set to shuffle:-) They would certainly be on my pre-order list if they were still together and producing CDs regularly. You should be very proud (as I know you are) as should he (as I hope he is). He is definitely a very talented writer in many areas.
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